Noel's excited about the big money on the table recently, and it's a hugely embarrassing introduction for DAVE.

He can't even build up Wakeyism anymore. Top walk from Dave to make up for it though.

Hopefully a much better game today.

He's 66, yet still wore his shirt hanging out, which Noel can't quite believe. "Covering the fat up" apparently.

Former greenkeeper, retired from that in 2010, but "greenkeeper" isn't quite the right description as he was actually in charge of maintaining the rough. Noel gets a playful dig in as a result of that, and the audience is still giggling as he introduces their wedding photo from "1967, I believe," but needs his wife to confirm exactly which year!

Deal Lights noted. Formalities complete. He has Box 8. We are away.

ROUND 1

Box 11 (Stephen) - £75,000
Someone was quick to whip up the noise in reply.

Box 10 (George) - £1,000
Dave's on top "dad dancing at the wedding" form, Noel's words not mine.

Box 5 (Pat) - £10
Called for the penny, that's not materially different in my book.

"I'm not superstitious..."
Box 13 (Christine) - £50
More dad dancing. Followed by quiet, which Noel fills hilariously by saying he's peaked too soon!

Box 1 (Kirsty) - £1
Only one bad box in the round.

BANKER TIME!

"We haven't finished yet." He thought there was another in the round.

He's from Frome, Somerset. His poetry, or as the Banker calls it "semi-illiterate guff," gets a mention. Banker also sees him as a board reader.

BANKER'S OFFER

£10,000

"He recognises you're here to play. And so is he."

Noel to the missus: "he's not going, is he?" His demands: Med cruise, smaller car, camper van. Her demands: refurbished engagement ring, which Noel mockingly prices up at £500k!

NO DEAL, obviously.

Cue a silly dance, and even a song. "Despite that, come back to the game."

The Shiny Competition is plugged.

Product placement!!

That poor PoTD really thought Noel was going to take his money!

Dad dancing can be a right pain in the - Anadin sponsors Deal or No Deal.

ROUND 2

Box 9 (Rich) - 50p
This was preceded by a question about his multiple TV remotes. Apparently he has both Virgin and Sky subscriptions, which is even more incomprehensible than the television that led to that box. I suppose the low blue was worth the wait. And it was a bigger gap to the dad dancing.

Noel thankfully talks him out of breakdancing. The Pilgrim of the Day (Romario?) apparently twerks on his head, with Noel producing hilarious disapproval of the idea. Whatever he did there, it was quite impressive, not to mention hilarious as a few pennies fall out. Banker claims the money as it's "his floor"! That's your lead-in for the Box 23 reminder, and now we're back in box-opening.

Box 12 (Cheryl) - £100
With this board and this pacing, I see a solid Deal coming.

Box 22 (Wayne) - £50,000
Death box does a job.

Banker time. Noel says the £50k was "unsettling but not destructive," and the Banker thinks it could be the pivotal moment.

BANKER'S OFFER

£13,000

£3k increase is generous considering the £50k went.

Camper van discussions: present. Deal Lights at red: absent.

NO DEAL it is.

Looks like he could be an OHO. At least he's not cautious... still remains to be seen.

ROUND THREE

Box 18 (Glyn) - £5,000
Still applauded after the massive poetry buildup.

Box 14 (Keith) - £35,000
"That's a big shame," says Noel. The board is suddenly volatile, and Noel is calling for the 1p and 10p when we come back.

No Noel, a big shame would be if that was the £250k or £100k! £35k isn't that bad.

Such ridiculous adverts these days, and this 8 out of 10 cats does countdown balls needs to die soon.

Brilliantly OTT advert for Go Compare. The McCain jacket potatoes are so underwhelming I threw a couple away today even though they go in the freezer.

And the new 8 Out of 10 Cats Countdown looks... quite something.

But now, "Disco Dave" is back! Noel again over-emphasises the pennies over the other blues. If this is a fiver...

Box 19 (Rosie) - £250
Gonna killjoy that, Noel?

Banker time...

Noel points out the best and worst possible final pairs are still on.

His reference to going to Cheryl's house in his camper van a round ago disturbed him.

With the game being seen to turn...

BANKER'S OFFER

£9,500

VERY UNFAIR DECREASE!!

That was worth at least a stick.

The Banker essentially says in veiled terms that he's responding to perceived momentum. In practice each round this game has been about as average as it gets.

NO DEAL it is.