If you want to see this episode in full without seeing the result, don't read this - click right here. It's all in Dutch, but you can skip to the DoND bit - which is utterly not dependent on language - by scrolling through to just after the second adbreak (marked by the little white lines). I had problems scrolling or going full screen in Firefox for some reason, but it worked fine on Google Chrome. Your mileage may vary. Note you'll get a single advert before each section.

Or you can just read the recap. Your call.
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IT'S BACK!

Actually it never went away. I just stopped recapping them. BUT NOW I'M BACK! Won't do any screencaps though.

The intro screams out "2x 5 MILJOEN EURO". It was 3x, then 2x, then 3x again, now 2x. Which means they've got rid of the giving away of the show winnings to everyone else with a lottery ticket in the postcode area again, but there'll still be someone at home winning what the player wins.

HELLO, PRIZE TREE CHANGE! Linda says there's now a €2m case!!

Each of the ten blocks is from a different local area. They made that clear a couple of years ago, the last season I watched. Not sure if it ever wasn't.

For those of you new to this show: ten blocks of 50 people compete in a quiz, from which - eventually - one contestant gets to play what we know as DoND. The exact quiz format has changed several times over the years.

This year, the first round sees five multiple-choice questions asked to everyone. The third of these is introduced by a video clip for the WWF. The World Wildlife Foundation, that is, aka the reason the "other WWF" is now WWE. And the WWF is one of the charities funded by the Nationale Postcodelotterij, who sponsor the show.

The top player from each block goes through to the next round. Absolutely none of them look like they could have been cast on a US game show other than Jeopardy! - and this is usual.

And they just gave away a bunch of coffee machines. Possibly one for everyone in the audience, all 500 of 'em. They've done that before.

There's an adbreak after this. In the original broadcast, this would be about six minutes. Watching online, it's about twenty seconds.

Now the top ten go head-to-head in pairs. So far, no change from last time I watched. I do love that each contestant has friends from their home town cheering them on at this point. The audience are all asked a yes/no question (some are faintly embarrassingly personal, some are topical - this week had one that I think asked if they expected the new coalition government in the country to last four years), and the contestants are asked to estimate how many people said yes. So basically it's the questions for control in Play Your Cards Right but with the surveys done seconds before with the studio audience. Nearest guess wins a spot in the final five and a bicycle, on the nose and you win a BMW.

This is also used to sort out the order for the third quiz round - closest guess starts in position 1, furthest away position 5. This matters because it's only the people in the top two positions who survive the round. It's questions on the buzzers, buzz in and get it right to move up a position, get it wrong and you go down.

Before that, the show gives away a new telly to everyone in one random block, and someone randomly chosen in it also gets €10,000. Just like that.

Once the quiz gets under way, it becomes utterly dominated by two players - Melvin, who started in position 1, and Steven, who started in position 4 then quickly moved up by getting the first two right. Each round lasts for 90 seconds, before the last-placed player is eliminated. It's entirely irrelevant though, because Steven and Melvin are basically doing a ballroom dance around podia 1 and 2 and nobody else buzzed in. At all. UNTIL HARRY GETS A QUESTION ON THE BUZZER AND GUESSES IT RIGHT!! That eliminates Kees, who has to settle for €2,000 (the contestant eliminated first gets €1,000). Can Harry break the astonishing duopoly in the final 90-second round? Well, it's on, because Melvin makes an error from position 2 and has to go behind Harry! But he gets back ahead of him with 40 seconds to go, and takes position 1... THEN HARRY GETS POSITION 2 AND STAYS THERE! Steven has to settle for €3,000. If you think that game's good enough to be a format of its own, you'd be right. It already was.

We call a break, which is a change of timing, as it used to be after this bit - the head-to-head showdown. Certain forum members will like this if they're unfamiliar with it - as it ensures a more cautious player doesn't play the DoND game. Basically, a counter goes up from €1,000 to an indeterminate amount. Press the button, it's yours, and the other player gets to play for the €5m. If neither presses before the count reaches the amount, it's a head-to-head maths question on the buzzer. It goes to €28,000 before stopping - very unusually low. Harry was slowly moving to press the button, but it didn't quite get to where he wanted it to!

So, one of them is going to really, really wish there was a little bit more to play for there. Who? Well, clearly not Brigitte Leferink, because she's randomly chosen from the audience and she gets the €28,000!

Maths question on the buzzer. I really hope Melvin gets this. Buzz in and be right, you're in. Buzz in and be wrong, the other player's in. No pressure.

167 + 167 = ??

Silence. Long pause. MELVIN GETS IT WRONG! He said 344, it's actually 334, and Harry has well and truly fluked his way into the biggest-money game on television!

As if that wasn't annoying enough, Linda has got her cowbell out. No, really. A randomly chosen audience member gets to hold that cowbell, can ring it at any time, and will win whatever's in that case up to a maximum of €50,000. Which, historically, has hilariously led to groans for low amounts and big cheers for a big amount.

Anyway, here come the models. 26 identically-dressed Shiny Sylphs - actually, that's a bit harsh, there's actually a slight variety of body types on display. As in the US version, they stand on the main staircase opening the cases from there; in previous incarnations of the quiz format, there were 26 people at one point in the quiz, and the 25 runners-up opened their cases and could win money for correct guesses. Anyway, in the here and now, Harry gets to choose his case, and he's thinking about 17. I like him a bit more now. He goes for CASE 7 though.

Corry van Hoof-Smolders wins €10,000 for being picked at random from an entire block who win a tandem bicycle each. This show hasn't heard of the word "recession".

Now, I warned you there's a new case amount. And in fact, the entire board has changed on the right hand side, making it a bit stronger, a bit less stable, and a lot more jarring.

Your new board for the biggest game in the world:



Let me say right here, right now, I absolutely hate this board. The €2m is woefully jarring - it should be €1.5m - and the board can get unstable much more easily, meaning more early Deals if the offers remain mostly bounded by the mean. And Miljoenenjacht rarely has players going right near the end anyway because of the huge stakes.

Harry talks about winning a million. He's excitably twitchy. Well, in this situation, you bloody well would be. He's with his wife Linda, and they have at least one grown-up child if I understood them rightly. Which I probably didn't. He talks about a "motor", so we can assume more safely that he wants a car.

Anyway. Let's go!

Round 1

Case 1 ("Why not?", Linda says) - €100,000. Gets absolutely no reaction. Which is staggering in any other context.
Case 2 (the entire audience laughs) - €2,500. Opened rather awkwardly by the Not!Sylph black model there.
Linda jokingly suggests case 3... and he goes with it!
Case 3 - €0.20! Good call. Still no reaction. "So far so good."
Case 6 (change of plan then!) - €10
Case 13 - €1,000,000! That €2m suddenly looks a bit more useful.
Case 5 - €2,500,000! Ouch.

OFFER €28,000

It's the amount that just eluded him minutes ago, as Linda points out. NO DEAL now of course.

Round 2

Case 8 - €0.01! With ABSOLUTELY NO REACTION AGAIN. If you're fed up with the 1p kiss and music, this is where you want to be!
Case 15 - €5,000. That's good too.
Case 9 - €50,000. "Yes!" says Linda. Scarily, I thought before that was opened that anything from there downwards was disposable.
Case 4 - €1! Linda is suddenly getting excited.
Right, we need the cowbell now... there we go. That audience member wins the lesser of €50,000 or whatever's in here. If only she'd rung before case 9. That would have been perfect. ADBREAK. Presumably to wake this audience up. They're always quiet in the DoND bit until the break and then suddenly get into it. It's really disconcerting.
Case 14 - €250,000 AND IT GETS A BIG CHEER! That's €50,000 for the audience member! At least as excitingly, that's the first new amount on this board to go.

And this is why I hate this board. Already everything above €40k can be taken out in a round, and yet there's €8.25m in four cases.

OFFER €68,500

There's advice from the audience. It's to go on. Which he does. NO DEAL. In fact, I typed that well before he actually did it. Nobody's dealt the second offer here. The third offer, on the other hand, is taken quite often. What will that offer be?

Round 3

Case 10 - €5,000,000!
Not very good, evidently. Good job he's got that new €2m.
Case 11 - €500,000!
Oh dear. His luck's finally run out it seems. Linda calls for 50 cents or 5 euro...
Case 16 - €5! Nice bit of playing with Linda from the model there.
Case 20 - €20,000. Linda liked that one.

Three of the top four amounts on this board are unfamiliar. Even the €750k wasn't on the original board, added only in 2006.



I'd half-consider a stick here. I'd actually want about €100k I think. Although even that sounds a bit low with so much money on the board, it's horribly, horribly unstable.

OFFER €66,000

Rumblings of discontent from the audience. They want him to go on. I'd go on. Think it's a 5.5% chance of losing both above the offer? NO DEAL!

Big round. This could, yet, be a historic crash.

Round 4

After a long discussion, he goes with his significant number...
Case 17 - €1,000! His luck is back, folks!
Case 18 - €50! Linda's into it again, the crowd are into it again...
Case 26 - €2,000,000! Was that a scream in the crowd I heard?

One-case game on the €750k.

OFFER €45,000

Only one higher. If he takes this, the lady with the cowbell is tonight's biggest winner. Lots of noise in the audience, with various advice, but Linda hushes them to point out that there's a one-in-eight chance that the €750k is on the table, but "problem is" there's a 25% chance it won't survive this round. Remember, two to open here, then one at a time. Linda talks about what €45,000 could do for Harry, mentioning the car.

I'd want to go on. Not entirely sure I would. He looks like he's fairly comfortable with his decision either way... DEAL!

He used up all his luck getting to the main game, and really I'm not that sorry it ran out once he was there. Marvin and Steven deserved it much more in my opinion.

PROVEOUT!

Case 12 - €0.50. Perfect start... if it were in live play.
Case 19 - €30,000. So the offer would have gone up, but we've not had regular proveout offers in ten years and we're not starting now.
Case 21 - €20!
Case 25 - €10,000...
Case 22 - €40,000! Two small amounts and €750k - offer would have been over €200k, easy Deal obviously. Linda says it'll be a "top Deal" if it's not €750k there...
Case 23 - €100! Some people are laughing.

A €500 v €750,000 final two! The last case on the stairs gets opened first...

Case 24 - €500! Case 7, on the table had €750,000! An immense Banker victory. He had unbelievable luck for an hour and then it all ran out.

I enjoy reading these. Are you going to be doing any more?

Yes, I've got a few to catch up on this week, it's almost like I've been saving them

Ahem