Channel 4 proudly presents an all new, all action game of DEAL OR NO DEAL.

Playing today is Colin.

Colin is into his boxing. He likes parenting and training kids in the sport.

I was losing interes in this but he also works at Leeds Univeristy! That's where I went.

And now we move onto some photos.

Bit bored by this so let's move onto Noel's shirt. He seems to be wearing this every time I commentate. It's the blue, pink, and purple stripey number.

Colin has box number 14 which he chose at random before the game began. It was sealed by the independent adjudicator who seals all 22 boxes and is the only one who knows where the money is.

Let's play DEAL OR NO DEAL.

What was all the carrying boxes malarkey about?

What if he opens box 2 and they need someone to carry the '2' around?

Box opening school for Roy then!

That has to be the WORST box opening of all time.

The BANKER rings and says this is a boxing match. Noel wants a scantily clad lady to walk past saying Round One, which is this round. But as it is Lee has to do it because he has box 1. I preferred Noel's idea.

Ladies and gentlemen, ROUND ONE.

21 - Liam - £75,000

13 - Roy - £750 - This could easily make any top 10 worst box opening competition.

15 - Rob - £1

4 - Kathy - Giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle i'll stop typing when she stops laughing giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle - £10

3 - Jean - £100,000

£5k holding offer?

The BANKER rings.

The BANKER says he used to box under the name Gorgeous Banker.

They're milking the boxing thing for all they can.

Banker's offer:

£6,789

Stats at 17 box

Average: £22,935.62
Fair deal: £7,685.04
Volatility: 1.79
Board total: £389,905.61

Banker's offer:

£6,789

1p
10p
50p

£5

£50
£100
£250
£500

£1,000
£3,000
£5,000
£10,000
£15,000
£20,000
£35,000
£50,000


£250,000

The BANKER says if Colin no deals this he will kill a small puppy.

This prompts Colin to quickly NO DEAL

He could have done £6,789.10

Down to £50k max at 16-box!

Ding ding! It's time for ROUND TWO.

The bearded one asks Colin about his boxing work and they talk lots of boxing title gibberish which I don't understand. Nicola Adams is a name that comes up. Some people may know who she is. There is a picture to aid the uninformed of us but I can't say it helped.

Who is going to be presenting this round I wonder?

Kev brings box 2 and is getting a bit more into this than I'd like. Noel thankfully pulls his jumper down to keep him from revealing too much.

2 - Jemma - £250,000

17 - Teresea who sounds like she's lifted from EastEnders - £20,000

1 - Lee - £3,000

I just HAD to mute the TV there. Noel talking in that cockney accent was horrible.

The BANKER rings and offers...

Banker's offer:

£910

Stats at 14 box

Average: £8,350.40
Fair deal: £3,217.32
Volatility: 0.75
Board total: £116,905.61

Banker's offer:

£910

1p
10p
50p

£5

£50
£100
£250
£500

£1,000

£5,000
£10,000
£15,000

£35,000
£50,000

The BANKER rings and says if Colin says no deal he will kill a small kitten.

NO DEAL

This is HORRIBLE!

Edmonds talks.

ROUND THREE (they're fed up of the round gimmick)

16 - Daisy - £15,000

20 - Jamie - £10,000

Time for a break.

The mean has plummeted to just £7,658.80 and it's only 12-box!

My images are all messed up here. BankerSpanker's smiley is the post reply button and the post reply button is a blue angel. Fun!