Noel: Hello, thank you very much indeed. I'm Noel Edmonds and a very warm welcome to Deal or No Deal, the show where the biggest winners are the biggest winners. Let's meet today's player.

On this very snowy day... hopefully a mega spanking to end the week on a good note.

Trev didn't have a box yesterday!

What can that mean?

Why yes - it's a Sunday episode!

That sketch of the Banker looks like Noel!

Trev: My name is Trev Twaite, which is the name I was born with. I come from somewhere no-one can pronounce.

Noel: And what do you get up to in your spare time?

Trev: I like twigging onto things and making jokes. I also draw sketches including this one of the banker.

Noel: Any family watching?

Trev: My son Mark is here. He plays football and we call him smurf.

Noel: And is there anything you'd like to not see come up today?

Trev: Well, I'm hoping to avoid taking out the £250,000. I'd rather not hit the £100,000 either.

Noel: Very good indeed. We'll learn more about you as the show goes on. There's only one person left for me to introduce. If his face was fit for public viewing then we wouldn't need this big old fashioned telephone - he's my Deal or No Deal friend, he's the Banker.

Banker: Hiya. Hello.

Noel: Good afternoon sir.

Banker: Good afternoon to you too. Are you well?

Noel: I'm very well thankyou.

Banker: It should be a cracking show today. 21 returning players so they have some experience and know how this works. The newbie today could be one to look out for, and of course Trev too.

Noel: Thank you very much indeed Banker. Now, all our boxes have been put before the Independant Adjudicator before the show began. What our contestent is trying to do is to open the boxes with the lowest amounts of money in them. Each time they do this of course they increase the chance of winning our jackpot. Now, Myyles didn't win the jackpot last time so today's jackpot is set to a cool £250,000.

Noel: Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Deal or No Deal.

Haha, brilliant!

So... Trev has box 3. That intro felt like it lasted quite a while. And there's still more talking.

Round 1

12 - Adam - 10p

Trev seems rather excited by that. Can't say I blame him.

He's going to keep number 9 til the end. Noel makes a note. Also number 15. Noel check's his watch. I check mine. He's giving reasons behind these choices but I don't care to write them down.

And finally there's 18. Noel just said today's date was the 15th. Presumably someone corrected him in his ear as he backtracked and said 20th.

2 - Warapom? (my TV can't see her name badge!) - £35,000

10 - Ahmed - £250,000

Noel rubs it in a bit.

19 - Guiseppe - £50

Trev says Danny has had blues so due a red. But he's got 15 so can't go there. Then he chooses box 18 but Noel points out he can't have that either. Noel calls Danny a child which is exactly what I was thinking. Danny calls Noel an old man!

1 - Trish - She's now talking. It's over 10 minutes into the show and we haven't even finished round 1. Now Ahmed is talking. Noel joins in. I think they've forgotten there's a game to be played here. Oh, she's going to open it - 50p

Finally!

The banker likes the drawing. He says he's not an idiot and it's clearly a picture of Noel that turned out a bit fat so he claimed it's the banker.

Banker's offer:

£4,500

Well, if you get all the 'humorous banter' out of the way early, it leaves time for tension late on. I guess that's the idea.

The first round took longer than usual... seemed forever.

Naturally there is lots of talking going on at this point. Trev says young people don't value money as much. But when you reach his age the money is more important because it's harder to earn more.

I am going to translate:

Trev: I'm not going to deal but I'll probably be dealing a low amount later as I've just emphasised how important it is to me.

NO DEAL and a break.

Did Noel just say if he didn't take out the £250k that he'd be offered £5k? That would be a crap offer if that really happened.

If I ever play the game, I'd do all the chat for between rounds, and not chat during the rounds themselves.

On we go. Hopefully a bit of pace here.

Or not. Noel is talking. Something about replacing a car. They're talking about what colour his car is. And now we're talking about what the car is used for. Can we please have 45 minute shows back?

Round 2

8 - John the Newbie - £20,000

Banker: I told you the newbie was one to watch out for!

We're now talking about the fact they need a new bed and something to do with the springs and I'd REALLY rather not hear too much more here.

The conversation moves onto something his parent's said when he was young. Always smile. And to be fair to Trev he does seem like a happy likeable guy.

4 - Irene - £5

Apart from the £250k this isn't a bad board.

They're talking about beds again. I've just checked the TV guide and believe it or not this game only has 1 hour scheduled. We're now half way through that time limit and we've not finished the 2nd round.

16 - Becky - £100,000

Should have kept my mouth shut about the strong board.

Oh come on, will you just OPEN A BOX already!

Oh, £100k? Ouch!

Too much chatting in this game. Half of the show almost gone!

Looks like it's not going to be a big money game at the moment...

At least all the blues have been low blues.

The banker now getting in the talking a lot. I think he wants to make him deal to stop all this smiling and happiness.

Banker's offer:

£2,000

NO DEAL

And a quick no deal!!

Round 3

20 - Tom - £750

13 - Kelly - £10

Someone must have told them to get on with it.

Time for a break. I do like Noel's comment about the "nation" returning to watch this game. I think he's over-playing the amount of people who watch this.

Trev says come back to see the banker get what he deserves. I think that's unfair. The Banker pays out lots and lots of money to everyone and just gets abuse