(I'm not numbering this show, I've not a clue whether this is a one-off, a pilot, or a run of shenanigans I'll be running with KP, but there you go...)

Good morning Europe!! Welcome to the Aaronvision Box Contest! We've got a hell of a lot of money up for grabs with a heavy Eurovision influence, and playing tonight is KP!

How does it work? Good question!

Step One: Get everyone's attention. A powerful majestic start. Maybe a battle horn of some kind...

Step Two: Get two amounts from the extreme end of the Deal UK gameboard - 1p and £250,000.

Steps 3 - 26: Find the rest of your board amounts. I have taken every Eurovision Grand Final result since 2013 (a total of 131 songs) and randomised them. You will choose 24 of them in total, of which the points score of 6 of those entries will be multiplied by £1, another 6 by £10, another 6 by £100 and the other 6 by £1,000. It means that your jackpot tonight could be £758,000!

Step 27: Choose a Twist! Of course we need a twist, and here are the six to choose from:

JURIES HAVE ALL THE POWER - Give 1-8, 10 and 12 points to songs outside of your Big 5 to multiply their value accordingly
BOOKIES FAVOURITE - Predict whether the sum of all the boxes you will be opening in the coming round will be higher/lower than those opened in the previous round correctly each time to activate the Bonus Box (MONEY BACK / +10% / +20% / +30% / +50% / DOUBLE)
UKRAINE CAN'T AFFORD IT - Your final budget (winnings) are can be reduced by the Calamity Case (MONEY BACK / 90% / 80% / 75% / 70% / 60% / 50%)
SAN MARINO QUALIFIED?!? - Each time you find the lowest amount on the board, you may remove one of your options from Box 27 (a maximum of 3 times before 8-box)
DIASPORA - You have £120,000 which you can split however you like amongst the chosen songs.

And finally, here's what that Box 27 looks like:

240%
120%
+£24,000
MONEY BACK
£1,944
HALF
12%

This is a complete mess, and I'm loving it before it's even begun!

So firstly, I need you to pick 24 numbers between 1 and 131, and which of those you'd like multiplying by £1, £10, £100 and £1,000!

Oh good grief. Let the wild dances begin! And if anyone sees this and is completely confused, it's safe to say you're not alone

x1 multiplier: 13, 37, 38, 42, 101, 118
x10 multiplier: 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 40
x100 multiplier: 102, 104, 106, 108, 110, 112
x1,000 multiplier: 17, 26, 63, 111, 123, 125

Alrighty, so let's see how this board will Rise Up!

x£1 Songs:
 United Kingdom 2013 - Bonnie Tyler "Believe in Me" - £23
 Moldova 2013 - Aliona Moon "O mie"- £71
 Montenegro 2015 - Knez "Adio" - £44
 United Kingdom 2016 - Joe and Jake "You're Not Alone" - £62
 Denmark 2013 - Emmelie de Forest "Only Teardrops" - £281
 Georgia 2016 - Nika Kocharov & Young Georgian Lolitaz "Midnight Gold" - £104

A mixed bag if ever I saw one, including one of our five most recent winners! Next up, then...

x£10 Songs:
 Romania 2017 - Ilinca ft. Alex Florea "Yodel It!" - £2,820
 Poland 2017 - Kasia Moś "Flashlight" - £640
 Spain 2016 - Barei "Say Yay!" - £770
 Russia 2014 - Tolmachevy Sisters "Shine" - £890
Croatia 2017 - Jacques Houdek "My Friend" - £1,280
Georgia 2013 - Nodi Tatishvili and Sophie Gelovani "Waterfall" - £500

Those are your blues, and let's see whether you'll be sailing on a sea of dreams after seeing your big numbers...

Final half, and this is where it really counts...

x£100 Songs:
 Ukraine 2013 - Zlata Ognevich "Gravity" - £21,400
 Ireland 2013 - Ryan Dolan "Only Love Survives" - £500
 Norway 2014 - Carl Espen "Silent Storm" - £8,800
 Belarus 2014 - Teo "Cheesecake" - £4,300
 Russia 2013 - Dina Garipova "What If" - £17,400
 Spain 2015 - Edurne "Amanecer" - £1,500

Only a couple there filling up the five-figures (plus you missed out on Jamala and Sergey between those evens gaps...)

Biggie now, the ones that could give you some huge money to play with...

x£1,000 Songs:
 Slovenia 2015 - Maraaya "Here for You" - £39,000
 Austria 2015 - The Makemakes "I Am Yours" - £0
 Israel 2015 - Nadav Guedj "Golden Boy" - £97,000
 Ukraine 2017 - O.Torvald "Time" - £36,000
 Belgium 2016 - Laura Tesoro "What's the Pressure" - £181,000
 Austria 2016 - Zoë "Loin d'ici" - £151,000

Austria providing both a hugely under- and overwhelming result! Let's load that board up and your 26 boxes look like this:

£0
1p
£23
£71
£44
£62
£281
£104
£500
£500
£640
£770
£890
£1,280
£1,500
£2,820
£4,300
£8,800
£17,400
£21,400
£39,000
£36,000
£97,000
£151,000
£181,000
£250,000

No increase to your jackpot, but some great opportunities at some huge cash! And now a number 1-6 for your twist please, and THEN we can begin!

That wasn't a great draw, but it's not like we're lacking in opportunities to win a bunch of money. Plus, two £500 boxes!

Twist number 2!

Number 2 is... BOOKIES FAVOURITE! You'll be playing Hi/Lo in each round up until we hit the one-box-at-a-time stage. Play that perfectly, and we'll open up the Bonus Box for a chance to double your winnings!

That's the shenanigans locked and loaded! Select your box and the first six (yes of course, 26-case opening rules) - and let the Aaronvision Box Contest begin!!

Boxes, START OPENING NOW! 17 on the table; 8, 2, 4, 6, 10, 12 to open. But you already knew that

Of course I did!


8 - £890 (Russia '14) - That one won't be shining its presence here any longer!

2 - £62! Out go Joe and Jake!

4 - £281 is Only Teardrops for Emmelie but no such upset for you at the moment!

6 - £97,000! Now we've have liked that Golden Boy to hang around a bit longer...

10 - £1,500 is fine from anotehr underrated G:son ballad...

12 - £104 is that bizarre qualifier from 2016, and now it's gone from your final! BT...

** RING **

The Banker, Mr Jon Ola Sand, welcomes you to the Preston Arena here in... Preston... and is looking forward to a great battle ahead!

BANKER'S OFFER

£8,500

You're welcome!

It's a NO DEAL for now, and I'm going to go HIGHER for the next five (22, 20, 18, 16, 14) based on expecting one six-figure hit in that lot!

Predicting at least some damage, but hopefully just enough that you can dance off!


22 - £8,800

20 - £500! Out goes Ryan Dolan...

18 - £17,400 is a goodbye to Dina...

16 - £71! Lovely stuff, bu only one chance for you to keep Bookies' Favourite in play...

14 - £1,280 means that indeed we lose the prediction game, but what a round!! BT...

** RING **

Mr Sand would like you to go Running Running Running with this offer now...

BANKER'S OFFER

£14,300

(Yes, yes that is Hungary 2014 x £100 )

Well, that'll do, I figured the prediction BB was bound to fall anyway!

NO DEAL, which I'm sure will be a popular decision 26, 23, 24, and 25...

The big money Don't Come Easy, but getting all the right boxes out of the way is the Secret Combination surely!


26 - £44! Great stuff...

23 - 1p!! The lowest non-ESC related amount, this is looking very good I must admit...

24 - £21,400 will increase the gravity on the amounts higher than it, but if we can just stay away from them now...

25 - £770! Awesome! Weak board who? BT...

** RING **

Mr Sand says that if yooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooou [don't take this offer, it will] shake your life like an earthquake...

BANKER'S OFFER

£24,900

... 100 Armenia 2016's!

With over £600k still on that board, this is moving up in a way I genuinely didn't prepare for. I'm wondering if I'm underestimating the offer generosity now because of that, but even if I am, there's enough strength and stability here that I can easily afford to be wrong on that front with so many offers left - NO DEAL!

15, 19, and 21...