Bloody hell, too much information or what?! If the Banker wants to go down, that's none of my business!

Anyway, even with the horrific image now stuck in my mind's eye, I do feel rather tempted by the return of the avocado.

Alas, the night rolls on, and my sharpness of wit is ebbing away like the Banker's libido. Wait, what? I mean, OK, I'm ready for the question. NO DEAL!

On we go, then, 9, 16 and 18 please

On we go indeed! Will this round be as horrifying as your imagery?!? I think you'd have to take out all of the top three for that to happen!

Box 9 - MINI PRIZE! And you definitely don't! Now, you'll at least have a Box 23 shot at a big prize if the game collapses, so that's a perfect box, better even than the 1p.

Box 16 - £50,000! The gap grows bigger, but Aaron proved in the last game that any time the jackpot is there deep into the game the Banker has to be scared...

Box 18 -

Yes!

The jackpot is still there at 8-box, and even after that round there's more backup than Aaron had (ie any).

1p
£10
£50
£500
£3,000
MAXI PRIZE
£35,000
£540,000

The Banker says this is a board where there really is no obviously "right offer" and it's hard for him to decide on one offer.

So he isn't. He's offering you two.

You can either take this offer...

BANKER'S OFFER

£26,000 AND NO 23

...or you can take this one.

BANKER'S OFFER

£30,000 ON COMPULSORY 23 + AVOCADO

If you were to take that option, you would have a 20% chance of £60,000, a 20% chance of nothing (other than the avocado), and a 60% chance of £30,000 with some sort of prize. Which could potentially be another avocado.

You must choose one of those offers if you're going to Deal. Or you could just play on and open three more boxes... Deal or No Deal?

Well, I hope you'll forgive me a bit of serious thought here, just for a moment - it's a delicate situation, and those words in your signature scream out to me now more than they ever have. Beware of words leading you astray, and all that.

It's a great line, because in situations like this, the words leading the player astray are often coming from within their own mind.

In the end, there has to be a decision somewhere down the line. I'm not completely sure that this is the right call. But I have to stand by it.

I'm ready.















NO DEAL!

AND ON WE GO! Huge call, turning down both of those offers... the Banker has to be hoping he's used up his bad luck lately, because three of the six biggest wins ever have come in the last seven games, and this could be another one for the collection!!

4, 6, 7, 8, 10, 13, and 14 remain available.

Come on! Right, next up, keeping the dream alive, we'll have 6, 10 and 14 please

Every box is huge here, every box brings the potential for you to look back at that 8-box offer combination with regret... but three boxes that are not the jackpot makes the Banker wonder if he should have gone bigger!

Box 6 -

Box 10 -

Box 14 -

The Banker: "I'm not completely sure I made the right call. But I have to stand by it."

The regrets are all his now.

£50
£500
MAXI PRIZE
£35,000
£540,000

With the jackpot looming large, he has to make one of the biggest offers he has ever made.

BANKER'S OFFER

£63,000 + AVOCADO

That would be the third-biggest win ever in the 58 games of this series. The second-biggest ever in the 57 games this Banker has presided over. But, of course, it would also be just a fraction of the jackpot that's still there, and which has apparently tempted you this far.

And now, at £63,000 and an avocado... Deal... or No Deal?

Well, David, it's a fairly good situation I suppose, it could've been worse...

This is another one that requires a bit of thought. £35,000 is a very nice backup, and I don't know what the Maxi Prize is, but it sounds good. Can you imagine that? 'Honey, how did you get on, did you win us loads of money like you said?' 'Oh, well, I turned down sixty-three grand and ended up with fifty quid, but it sounded good...'

It's at this point that the avocado begins to lose some of its significance, really, isn't it?

We stand here, you, the Banker, and I, somewhere close to the summit of the mountain. It's within sight, it's nearly within reach, but however many miles you climb, the last few yards are the longest of all.

I know it, you know it, we all know it. The answer.























NO DEAL!

That... is one heck of a decision.

It will now be either ruthlessly punished, or spectacularly rewarded. It has to be one or the other.

4, 7, 8, and 13 left. One of them will stay untouched... good luck.

As ever, KP, we live by the sword...

The final round, then. It's been a titanic tussle, Mr Banker.

I keep my old box 4 to the end, and my last selections are 7, 8 and 13.

The chase is on! Oh, wrong show.

Box 7 -

Box 8 -

Box 13 -

The Banker sighs over the phone.

"You aren't the tin man; you have a heart. Now prove you aren't the scarecrow, and show you have a brain."

BANKER'S OFFER

£150,000

A reminder, it's £500 in one of those boxes, £540,000 in the other, and you can swap Box 2 for Box 4.

Not much more needs to be said, because this is as pure concentrated epic DoND as you're ever likely to see... at £150,000... Deal... or No Deal?

I've had some time to think. I've had some time to look at the stats for this series. I know where £150,000 would put me.

Perhaps this is the perfect ending to this game, because some of the young daniel123's gung-ho, to-hell-with-it-all spirit has taken me this far, and you and I both know I'm about to exercise the self-restraint, and maturity, that he would've ridiculed. But that's alright, because he'd have gone home with £500. And I'm not.


It's a DEAL!

DEAL! The record falls AGAIN!

We do need to find out if the old one-track mind would have taken you to the jackpot or £500. It depends on whether or not you'd have swapped of course...

...Box 2 had the £540,000!! So you DID have it all along, but I doubt that's much comfort at all to the Banker at this moment because you only sold it at the last moment! Box 4 had £500...

...and technically the game isn't over! You have Box 23...

DOUBLE (£300,000)
ADD MAXI (£150,000 + maxi prize)
ADD MIDI (£150,000 + midi prize)
ADD MINI (£150,000 + mini prize)
NOTHING

...and four of those options would make your winnings even bigger. The other... wouldn't. In fact, it'd take them all away, not even an avocado left. To buy Box 23 with your £150,000, Deal or No Deal?

Ah, there we are, good to know what was in the box but I can't say I care too much

I think statistically-speaking here, I'd be foolish to turn down Box 23. On the other hand, I'm aware of the chance that I'll lose the £150,000, and the record with it.

I'm going to say DEAL to Box 23!

...wow. £150,000 on the line.

The Banker rings up. "After that decision, I take back everything. You deserve the NOTHING."

Pick an option, 1-5, and avoid the landmine!!